T. O' Donnell

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Do you want to look ten years younger?

Here are twelve beauty tips that are guaranteed to work, if you follow them *all*. There's no point eating fresh fruit and vegetables, and then smoking like a chimney!

1. Moisturise.

This is a misnomer, you can't actually put water in your skin. You can, however, oil it up (like leather!), and trap water next to the skin.

After every wash, put an inert oil on your face. Johnson's Baby Oil is good. Put it especially on your laughter-lines (around the eyes), your forehead, around the mouth and on the neck.

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